I injured my left knee at games today , I said the F*** word , which I did not ever use to insult or swear at anyone for a LONG LONG time , to swear when I was playing bball with Aaron and Wei Xian . . . Let's see...how could this get any worst ?
1.Apparently , I'm so stupid , ugly , retarded , mean , arrogant , hateful , judgmental etc. etc. , that I have no rights to have a crush on YOU , until the point where YOU get frustrated all because of this .
2.Cg isn't encouraging anymore , it's not them , it's just me . . .
All I hear these days are this : " Declan , you're such a retard , you're arrogant , hateful , judgmental , ugly , nerdy , stupid ... You don't even have real friends ! No one ever liked you , not even your friends . Your friends hates you , your family hates you , everyone does . "
How am I supposed to overcome this ? When all I see is truth in it .
I'm gonna start hating then , since it's seemingly the only way .I know , there IS another , but I do not have enough of everything to do it . . .
People , if you're still my "friend" even after reading this , please , if you know me well , you really ought to know that there is only ONE way to defuse me , all you have to do is to restore the SHIELD , however , I can't do it myself , and many people can't help me too , please , if you're gonna do it , be strong , I'm gonna apologize to you in advance , because I'm gonna say really hurtful things then . If you're gonna do it , please , make sure you're strong yourself , if not , I'm just gonna bring someone else down .
The time when I need you the most , I have just strayed too far away from you .
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